|Bob's Burgers character|
|Hair||Bald, previously blonde|
|Relatives|| Denise (ex-wife)|
|Behind the scenes|
|Voiced by||Larry Murphy|
|“||So it's not me then?||”|
Theodore "Teddy" is a carpenter/handyman and one of Bob's few friends and is a frequent diner at the restaurant.
While kind and a loyal customer, Teddy is known for telling long winded stories and being overly chatty. He desperately wants to be part of the Belcher family and frequents Bob's Burgers in order to have someone to talk to because he is lonely. In Bed and Breakfast, Teddy reveals that he once had a "three way", or at least watched his ex-wife have sex with Ray, a man who dresses as a seal down at the amusement park. Because of this, Teddy's greatest fear is costumed characters and their "soulless eyes". One of his relatives owned a speak-easy named Swanky's, originator of the mixed drink "The Swanky Panky".In The Belchies, Teddy tells Louise, Gene and Tina a story about the treasure under the abandoned Taffy Factory. Although there was gold, Teddy thought the story was really just a joke. In Full Bars, he hosts a black and orange Halloween party which turns hilariously tragic when he finds Francis, his pet guinea pig, flattened and quite dead. In The Deepening, he has a major role in the episode when he has to confront Mr. Fischoeder's mechanical shark; the very same shark Teddy had worked with while shooting a film several years earlier. In Topsy it is revealed that Teddy owns a large Van de Graaff generator, which he knows how to operate, but not very safely. Teddy, for one episode, was enemies with Louise because he occupies her room during his stay at the bed and breakfast. When Louise finds out his phobia of costumed characters, she orders several over the telephone, which drives him out.
Teddy was once married to Denise, but they divorced after she left him for someone who was into boats. Following their divorce, Teddy spent years fixing up a boat which he christens Sea Me Now to try and impress her. It is revealed Denise cheated on him during their relationship and made him go to the bathroom in the yard.
In "Bed & Breakfast" after experiencing his greatest fear, he decides to go for a drink with the owl, being sure that it is being portrayed by a woman until Bob corrects him that the fox was a woman.
In "The Deepening" a potential relationship got ruined by the mechanical shark operator which caused him to spill his drink over the girl in heavy prosthetic make-up. For years after this Teddy blamed the shark itself.
In "I Get Psy-chic Out of You", Linda gives Teddy a vision that he is to meet a woman in a yellow dress and he'll find a nickel. Later in the episode he phones her asking if the dress has to be yellow as he has found a woman wearing a vest with a yellow floral pattern. During the credits he is seen dancing with the woman.
Teddy has a sister, Dana, who's married to a man named Dan. His mother, who is partially blind, lives some distance away from him and flies in for visits. Not much is known about Teddy's father who is implied to be deceased as Teddy dedicated his cover of Natalie Merchant's wonder to him in "The Millie-churian Candidate" and that Teddy's mother went with Teddy on a singles cruise in "Gayle Makin' Bob Sled" and, as of "Thanks-Hoarding", has an age-inappropriate boyfriend who Teddy and Dana exclusively call "Boy-toy."
- "Don't feed a guy a sponge, Bobby!"
- "Do not come in here! Nobody come in here! Someone threw up in the bounce house. Kids, kids, kids you can't go into the bounce house, someone threw up in there. I don't know....I don't know what happened. Who wants to dance?"
- 'My temporary house, my temporary rules! You don't like it? There's the door that you can't go out of!'
- 'No, Gene. Kurt is seducing your Mommy.'
- 'No, that was my second cousin, and it was third base.'
- 'I made this guy say yes with my body!'
- Bobby, want to come over and watch the game tonight? I'm making a three-bean salad, but it's bring your own bean. Can I put you down for garbanzo?
- 'It's a butt! Get it? A butt! With three turds!
- Gretchen's sister is skinny, Lin, but it's because she's on methamphetamines.
- "We'll be doing many things this weekend like dinner, rough housing but not too rough, brushing teeth, and going to bed."
- "There's a clog in there, and it could be underwear, what will it find? Goop? Probably goop."
- "I can fix it!"
- "When I come back in here tomorrow there better be a frigging burger on that board!"
- Teddy appeared in every episode in Season 2.
- It has been suggested that Teddy had a bad relationship with his parents growing up ("Father of the Bob"). It is also implied in ("Nude Beach"), when the new health inspector, Tommy, is singing "Daddy, you are my enemy." Teddy begins to loudly and tearfully sing along.
- Teddy makes his own home brewed beer ("Speakeasy Rider").
- At his first cousin's wedding, Teddy threw up in the bounce house ("Bob and Deliver").
- Teddy has only one testicle ("Lindapendent Woman").
- Teddy is left handed in "Sacred Cow" and "Christmas in the Car", but is right handed in "Uncle Teddy".
- He is allergic to peanuts ("Adventures In Chinchilla-Sitting").
- He drives a lime green pickup truck with a cream stripe running long it.
- It has been implied his last name begins with "J", in the conversation where he tells the kids they could call him T.J. (Uncle Teddy) In "The Gayle Tales", he is named Theodore the Blacksmith in Tina's Lady Chatterteeth's Lover essay, strongly implying that Teddy is a nickname for Theodore. In "Thelma & Louise Except Thelma is Linda", Teddy lies about having a wife and gives her name as Karen McGillicuddy, an implication that this may be his last name.
- His favorite color is yellow. ("I Get Psy-chic Out of You").
- Once played Blake in a production of Glengarry Glen Ross.
- Appears to be religious as he has intentions to watch church on TV in "Christmas in the Car" and has intentions to attend midnight mass in "Father of the Bob". Despite not being Jewish, he plays for a Jewish ice hockey team called The Mighty Schmucks.
- In "Turkey in a Can", he mentions that his father potty trained him when he was seven and finally learned when he was fourteen.
- Appears to be a Chaka Khan fan. ("Eat, Spray, Linda")
- Teddy has a habit of eating whatever is put in front of him, including in "Synchronized Swimming" where Bob told him to "eat this", and it turned out to be a sponge piece.
- Favorite member of Boyz4Now is Allen.
- Has a therapist called Dr. Marjorie.
- He uses a McLecklin hammer, which he claims is "The Meryl Streep of hammers". He used it to destroy Bob's Fukinawa knife. ("The Millie-Churian Candidate")
- Once had a fear of babies ("House of 1000 Bounces").
- Teddy wears a hat because his ex-wife, Denise, said that the back of his head looks like a butt. ("Sea Me Now")
- His mother is partially blind ("Aquaticism").
- Teddy's shoe sizes are 13 on the left foot and 11 on the right. ("The Secret Ceramics Room of Secrets")
- His next door neighbor bootlegs concerts. ("Cheer Up, Sleepy Gene")
- Teddy has some similarities to Bill Dauterive from King of the Hill:
- Both are good friends with the main character.
- Both are kind and loyal.
- Both have been divorced.
- Both are overweight.
- Both are emotionally needy.
As a main character, Teddy has appeared in all but a handful of episodes, the episodes in which Teddy has NOT appeared in are listed below;
Teddy appears in every episode in this season.
- Mutiny on the Windbreaker
- An Indecent Thanksgiving Proposal
- Tina-Rannosaurus Wrecks
- Two for Tina
- It Snakes a Village
- The Kids Run the Restaurant
- Boyz 4 Now
- There's No Business Like Mr. Business Business
- The Laser-inth
- Mom, Lies, and Videotape
- Into the Mild
- Main article: Teddy/Gallery
- Main article: Teddy/Gallery